“Sick and embarrassing secrets”

Six weeks before she was killed Kitty Menendez told her therapist she was hiding “sick and embarrassing secrets.”

A photo of the excerpt of the transcribed therapy notes can be found in Robert Rand’s book “The Menendez Murders,” and on the Photos page on his website:

The excerpt reads as follows:
(07/05/89) There is a notation that she feels what she is hiding is sick and embarrassing. He said it possibly referred to her earlier life but that it is more likely that it refers to her adult life. His reasoning was that what happens to you as a child, by the time you become an adult no longer seems sick and embarrassing. As an adult you have a sense that you were not responsible for what happened to you as a child. However, if the secrets came from adulthood, then it would be sick and embarrassing since you would be the one responsible for it.

What was Kitty Menendez referring to? Something that happened during her childhood or adulthood? Was it something that happened to her personally, or something that happened to someone else within her knowledge? Something she did to someone?

I don’t find it persuasive that the therapist reasons that Kitty “more likely” referred to her adulthood than her childhood. I think it varies from person to person how long events in one’s life remains sick and embarrassing.

According to Robert Rand’s book, Kitty’s sister Joan told Rand that she believed Kitty may have been abused when she was a young girl. (Page 244.) That could be what Kitty was referring to as “sick and embarrassing” if she was referring to her childhood.

If Kitty referred to her adulthood in the session with her therapist, the alleged sexual abuse of her sons by her husband and herself could be what she was referring to as “sick and embarrassing.”

Personally, since I don’t believe the Menendez brothers were sexually abused, I don’t believe she was referring to sexual abuse of her sons. I think Kitty referred to either something that happened to her during her childhood, or something that had nothing to do with sexual abuse at all.